My 2 year old is...

…Fast becoming a toddler though just as lovable and cute but someone that demands more of your time, attention and shallow depths of my parenting skills.

She is now fiercely independent with a will and mind far beyond both of her years but this also gives her the ability to push the boundaries, testing her parents and of course reaping the consequences. Most of the time a pleasure to be around or normal, the definition of normal depends on points I have mentioned previously such as your parenting style, the nature V nurture debate with the addition of external (siblings, pets and etc) and environmental (allergies, living conditions and etc) factors. Your kids can be a shit compared to others and vice versa but that does not mean that is not normal for them. Whatever is normal for your kid they are also at times not normal. As they grow older, wiser and more independent they will test you when they feel like it, when they are tired, cranky, sick, hungry and even when they need to drop a deuce. Being around other kids even for short period of time can alter their behaviour.

Being the youngest of 3 boys from the oldest of 6 boys it became apparent that the youngest got picked on. So at a young and underdeveloped age being the youngest sibling, cousin and grandchild I copped a lot but was not wise enough to understand fully and the only logical way to act out was anger. This translated well later in life to the sporting field and kind of reinforced the point. Using scare tactics, anger and loud voices does work with kids, for a very short period of time.

Reinforcing over and over and over again in a calm manner that we don't bite the dogs ears or give your 5 month old brother raisins will and does work. For me, biting the kids ear in return only validates that biting is OK, you are setting examples and the phrase "monkey see, monkey do" is very much in full effect now. Don't drive with the window down and your arm out of the car because that is all they will want to do

Consequences are essential but must be realistic, effective but most importantly, implemented! I found around 2 is a good time to introduce punishment or repercussions. If your justice is no Elmo for 3 days they will not understand why they can't have Elmo in 3 hrs (or sooner) let alone days. Choose your punishment that is short and immediate to start with and work from there. To say "stop hitting your mother I will cut your arm off", and you don't, you're basically condoning their behaviour. My daughter loves the Park, going to the park to play with the kids, is all she talks about constantly, every day, its paaaainful though a very good bargaining chip. I can get her to do or stop doing anything I want (even tantrums) with the threat of not going to the park. Don't threaten kids if you are not going to follow through.

To say that I have not pinched or bit my kid in return would be a lie, a lie would also be if I thought it was effective. It happens when you are tired, cranky or at your wits end and you have tried everything else but it should not be normal practice. I was hit when I grew up and I see kids these days that perhaps should be or should have been but it is not an effective and sustainable parenting tool/style to raise healthy well balanced adults. I do agree however that in the case of extreme and imminent danger (running onto the road, standing on railings and etc) a smack across the ass can deliver an astute and clear message.

On the flip side you must give credit where credit is due. Praising them when they do something right is also a great tool especially when they do something that you ask of them, praise their listening, and let them know you are happy and proud. Don't be always pointing out the negative as that’s what they will focus on, instead try distracting them with another toy or doll instead of biting the vacuum cleaner cord.

The art of distraction is mightier that the pen and the sword.

Kids are smart, intelligent and observant little miracles and the funny thing is we want them to be so use that to your advantage. Set a good example and not just with them but let them see good behaviour and manners from everyone in the house. Kids are smart and so are you, but the advantage you have is that, you're smarter.